Category Archives: Crime

Murder in Paradise – The Brutal Beauty of Dovedale

Named for a tragedy & rocked by a murder, serene Brothers’ Water hides its secrets below the majestic cliffs of Dove Crag. I walk up to the Priest Hole and tell Dovedale’s stories.

Brothers Water
Brothers’ Water

The northern finger of Brothers’ Water is a perfect mirror, reflecting the willowy trunks of silver birch and their billowing canopies of summer leaves. An impressionist study in myriad shades of green, backed by the silver elegance of the lake and framed by the lofty pyramids of Caudale Moor and Middle Dodd. The third sister in this sorority of steep chiseled hills, High Hartsop Dodd is just hidden by the shoreside trees of Low Wood. A trinity of roughly symmetrical pyramids is a familar sight to anyone ascending Kirkstone Pass from Patterdale, but the common view has Hartsop Dodd assuming the leftmost position. Here at the water’s edge, Hartsop Dodd is over my shoulder and the northwest ridge of Caudale Moor steps from its shadow to assume its position.

High Hartsop Dodd and Middle Dodd
High Hartsop Dodd and Middle Dodd

A finely rippled plate of polished pewter mottled yellow and green with reflections of sunlit grass and leaf, the cool expanse of Brothers’ Water is a tranquil idyll, but it owes its name to a tragedy. Originally known as Broad Water, it became Brothers’ Water to commemorate the victims of a drowning. Two siblings took a shortcut across its frozen surface, unaware that a thaw had set in, and the ice was no longer thick enough to support their weight.

Gray Crag Hartsop Dodd and Caudale Moor over Brothers Water from Hartsop Above How
Gray Crag Hartsop Dodd and Caudale Moor over Brothers Water from Hartsop Above How

According to Harriet Martineau (in her 1855 Guide to the English Lakes), it was a tragedy that played out twice, repeated later with another pair of brothers. An apparent dearth of evidence has led many to assume the story is little more than local folklore, but in his Scafell Hike blog, Raymond Greenhow makes a convincing case that the second set of brothers were John and George Atkinson, who fell through the ice in the winter of 1785/1786. Their father was watching and desperately tried to warn them off, but tragically, they failed to heed his frantic gesticulations. Raymond cites an article dating from the time of their funeral, which suggests the lake was already known locally as Brothers’ Water because a similar drowning had occurred centuries before.

Beyond the lake, the track leads to the oldest building in Patterdale, the sixteenth century farmhouse of Hartsop Hall. From this angle, it looks smaller than it is. Its southwestern wing is obscured by its whitewashed front, replete with narrow windows topped with rounded arches, like those in Norman churches. Two stone-carved rams’ heads above the door give the impression of gargoyles and add to the ecclesiastical air.

Hartsop Hall
Hartsop Hall

In 1835, Hartsop Hall was home to twenty-seven-year-old Thomas Grisedale. This track would have been his walk home after visiting the White Lion pub in Patterdale. On the fateful night of Sunday 8th March, however, he never made it back. His gravestone in Patterdale churchyard says he was “brutally murdered by an unprovoked assassin”.

In the Penrith Observer on Tuesday 22nd July 1952, a correspondent relates the story as told to him by the late Mr Nixon Westmorland.

“On March 8, 1835, two Alston men, Joseph Bainbridge and John Greenwell, went to the White Lion Inn, where they had a quarrel with some of the residents. They left the inn and, on the way back to the mine, they cut themselves thick sticks from the hedge to defend themselves against attack from assailants.

While they were doing this they heard footsteps, and Greenwell, thinking it was one of their opponents, rushed forward and, in the dark, stabbed the man who was coming towards them. He turned out to be Thomas Grisdale, who was returning to his home—Hartsop Hall, where he lived with his parents…

Greenwell and Bainbridge were tried at Westmorland Assizes at Appleby. The latter was acquitted, and Greenwell, who was sentenced to death, was later reprieved and transported.

Mr Westmorland’s mother went from Penrith to Appleby to take Greenwell a clean shirt, because the one he was wearing was bespattered with the victim’s blood, and she thought what a serious thing it was for a man to be tried in a blood-stained shirt.”

A beautifully written and diligently researched account of the story on the Grisedale Family History blog quotes an almost identical account penned in 1903 by Rev. W P Morris, Rector of Patterdale, but the blog then goes on to question whether this was what really happened, citing an eye-witness testimony from the court reports of the day. The witness, George Greenhill (Greenhow in some newspaper reports) was with Thomas Grisedale in the White Lion and testified to seeing Greenwell get into a fight with a man named Rothey. Grisedale stepped in to separate the pair. Bainbridge and Greenwell continued to utter threats and boasted they would fight any two men in the dale. The witness goes on:

“The deceased said very good-naturedly, that if it was daylight he would take both of them, and he would then in the house, if anybody would see fair play. After this Bainbridge and Greenwell became so troublesome, that the landlord put them out. In the course of a little time the latter returned, and was again thrust out, but in these matters the deceased did not interfere. In the mean time the witness and two lads went out of the house with the deceased. Soon after, they saw Bainbridge call Greenwell to the end of the house, and they procured each a stick, about a yard long, and a little thicker than a walking stick. They came running towards these three, who ran out of their way for some distance, when the deceased, having not retreated awhile, said, ‘I have not melt (meddled) with them, why should I run away?’ and stopped. The witness ran on about twenty yards further, and then stopped also. On turning his head, he saw the prisoner Greenwell run up to the deceased, and make a push at his belly, and then at his breast near the neck. The deceased seized the prisoner by the collar and pushed him away, and then put one hand to his belly, and the other to his breast, saying, ‘Oh Lord, I’m killed, he has stabbed me’”.

This statement was corroborated by two other eyewitnesses, John Chapman and Thomas Chapman. After the judge had advised the jury that the distinction between murder and manslaughter rested on provocation, they took just ten minutes to decide on a verdict of wilful murder.

The judge sentenced Greenwell to hang at Appleby on Mon 16th March. His reprieve must have come late indeed as the following Saturday both the Yorkshire Gazette and the Bolton Chronicle reported that his execution had taken place. However, eighteen days later, the Cumberland Pacquet announced that Greenwell’s sentence had been commuted to deportation to New South Wales. The judge had been convinced Grisedale’s death was manslaughter and not murder.

His decision may have been influenced in part by the cause of death. The doctor who attended Grisedale, reported that the victim’s bowels were protruding through the wound, and had been “strangulated” by a manual attempt to compress them. Presumably, a well-wisher or even Grisedale himself had attempted to push them back in. The doctor concluded that the resulting injury as much as the original wound may have been the cause of death.

Another factor may have been the reliability of the witnesses. The court report quoted in the Grisedale Family blog is taken from the Annual Register of the Year 1835, published in 1836, but an account of the proceedings in the Kendal Mercury from the week of the trial, attributes much of the detail to John Chapman’s testimony. This matters perhaps only because eleven days later the Chapman brothers were themselves brought before a magistrate accused of raping a girl on the night of Grisedale’s murder, before visiting the White Lion Inn. The magistrate threw out the capital case for insufficient evidence but fined the Chapmans and held them both to bail over their future good behaviour. Indeed, the report of this incident in the Westmorland Gazette on 28th March 1835 considers it “somewhat extraordinary that the affair did not transpire until after [Greenwell’s trial at] the Assizes at Appleby”.

A third factor might have been the question of provocation. The Kendal Mercury on 21st March 1835 reported:

“We are given to understand that the recent melancholy transaction in the village of Patterdale had its origin in one of those Lowther Treats which have been given throughout this county. The treat for that district was held on Thursday the 5th inst. on which occasion some friends of the opposite party partook of refreshments at another house. In the evening the opposing parties came in contact, and a fight or two took place. We are not aware that the deceased had any share in those broils, but Greenwell had; and the ill feeling engendered that night continued to exist until the Sunday when Grisedale was killed, most probably having been kept alive in the interval by continued drinking and idleness.”

The Lowther Treats were a series of feasts given throughout the county by Lord and Col. Lowther to shore up political support. They consisted of lavish spreads of roast beef and plum pudding and (presumably copious) quantities of home brewed ale. The Mercury damned such political turpitude as deplorable and insisted those responsible should shoulder moral responsibility for the consequences of the debauchery they promoted, urging all right-thinking people to withdraw their support for the Lowthers.

But a Lowther Treat was not the only reason for widespread drunkenness and local tensions. The weekend in question coincided with a payday for the workers of Greenside Mine. At the time, the miners collected their wages, twice a year, from the Angel Inn in Penrith. Many made the journey on foot. Payday weekends often resembled fairs where all the stresses that had built over six months of hard labour and atrocious on-site living conditions were given full vent. You can imagine the scene: scores of rowdy miners eager to let off steam, with half-a year’s wages in their pockets; Patterdale hostelries keen to take their money; but their local clientele, with far less brass to hand, perhaps a little less kindly disposed towards them. Grisedale’s brutal demise put a stop to the bi-annual pay days in Penrith. After that, wages were paid at the mine.

Beyond the hall, the terrain grows wilder. The path splits and I take the right-hand fork that climbs over the foot of Hartsop Above How. A verdant trod, lined with long-grass and bracken, stippled pink with foxgloves, and overhung with the leaves of ash and hawthorn. The gentle hiss of Dovedale Beck drifts up from the valley bottom. I hear that chatter of chaffinches and the sweet song of a blackbird. If you were to embody tranquility in a place, it would be right here right now. The rowdy violence that led to Grisedale’s untimely demise now belongs to another world—one long departed from Patterdale and especially Dovedale.

Dovedale path over the foot of Hartsop Above How
Dovedale path over the foot of Hartsop Above How

In 1946, the country received another kind of “Lowther Treat”. At the time, Brothers’ Water, High Hartsop Hall and some of the surrounding fells belonged to the Lowther Estate. Faced with paying death duties for the late Lord Lonsdale, the Estate put the land up for sale. The government took the opportunity to procure it for the nation, placing it under the care of the National Trust.

Dove Crag over Stangs from Dovedale
Dove Crag over Stangs from Dovedale

There is drama here still, but it is of a natural and inspiring kind. Across the beck, the long ridge of Stangs protrudes, green and gnarly like some gargantuan antediluvian crocodile, while above it, the sun spotlights the dale’s crowning glory—the breathtaking precipice of Dove Crag. Eventually, the path crosses the beck and leads up into the feral wilderness of Huntsett Cove, the terrain growing rockier and more mountainous. Here trees give way to large boulders and stone outcrops rise from the foliage like preludes to the sheer wall of cliff that rises ahead. Carved by ice and the passage of imponderable time, Dove Crag is a skyward ascension of pillars and ribbed vaults: temple-like—humbling and uplifting.

Dove Crag
Dove Crag

The path becomes a rocky ladder climbing steeply beside formidable crags into Houndshope Cove. Just before a tiny tarn, a huge boulder marks the junction with a much fainter path, not much more than a sheep trod, that seems to disappear into the precipitous rocks.

Dove Crag
Dove Crag
Eyeing Dove Crag from Hunsett Cove
Eyeing Dove Crag from Hunsett Cove


Two of the historic features which Hartsop Hall boasts are: a garderobe, a castle-style privy that suggests the house might once have been fortified; and a priest hole, which suggests that the Elizabethan owners were catholics, prepared to hide priests from the zealous protestant authorities hell-bent on their persecution. The Priest Hole is also the name given to a cave in the cliffs of Dove Crag. It is a natural feature, and its denominational associations are purely metaphorical, although undoubtedly would have made an excellent hiding place for clergymen of the Old Religion.

Dove Crag from Hunsett Cove
Dove Crag from Hunsett Cove

The cave is where this side path leads, climbing up among the boulders and traversing the steepening slope. After a short while, the way ahead looks blocked by a wall of crag. A narrow scree gully ascends to where a good path traverses above the wall, but the ascent looks steep and loose. Fortunately, straight ahead, there is a breach in the wall. A sketchy semblance of a path heads up to a rock step, which proves easy to scale. It leads to flatter grassier ground and climbs gently to the cave’s entrance.

The Priest Hole
The Priest Hole

The Priest Hole is no longer a well-kept secret. It is now a popular wild-camping spot and graces many a bucket list. Sadly, not all its visitors abide by the code and litter can be a problem. It looks magnificent from the outside, a small wall, narrowing the entrance and providing shelter for inhabitants. I approach with a little apprehension, hoping the romantic vision won’t be sullied by detritus. It contains a solitary sleeping bag and a mat, but the neatness of their arrangement suggests they haven’t been abandoned. It’s early yet. Perhaps the owner is about their morning ablutions, or perhaps a climber has bivouacked here overnight and is already scaling the cliff. I hope I’m right. I leave it undisturbed and perch outside to sip coffee and drink in the astounding aspect (half expecting the occupant to reappear at any moment).

View from the Priest Hole
View from the Priest Hole

The view sweeps down over Dovedale to the southern shore of Brothers’ Water with the steep straight edge of Hartsop Dodd rising beyond. To the northwest, I gaze over the green spine of Hartsop Above How to the slate-grey eminence of Place Fell. In between and hidden from view lie the village of Patterdale and the White Lion Inn. Nestled between Sheffield Pike, Greenside, and Raise, are the old mine workings. Greenside mine closed in 1962, but its heyday was long behind it. When the miners left the valley, its hostelries greeted a new breed of visitor, who came to explore these hills not for their mineral wealth, but for the physical and spiritual rewards exposure to such majestic natural wonders can bring. Many fellwalkers were, and still are, inspired by a set of guidebooks, produced as a love-letter to these slopes and summits—The Pictorial Guides to the Lake District. Alfred Wainwright began work on the first of these, The Eastern Fells in the autumn of 1952, and the very first chapter he wrote was the one on Dove Crag.

View from the top of the crag
View from the top of the crag

Sources / Further Reading

The Grisedale Family blog gives a beautifully written and diligently researched account of the Grisedale murder.

https://grisdalefamily.wordpress.com/tag/patterdale

Raymond Greenhow provides fascinating account of the truth behind the story of how Brothers’ Water got its name.

https://scafellhike.blogspot.com/2015/11/brothers-water-monument-in-landscape.html?m=1

Wainwright Archivist, Chris Butterfield tells the story of Wainwight’s first Pictorial Guide, The Eastern Fells.

Richard Jennings provides a great step-by-step guide to this magnificent route to the top of Dove Crag, and talks about some of the industrial features that can still be spied among the rocks and undergrowth. Richard’s route carries on over Little Hart Crag and High Hartsop Dodd. I went the other way over Hart Crag and Hartsop Above How. Both provide fine Dovedale circulars.


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    Thorn Of Crowns

    The Rites of Spring & the Secret of Crummock Water

    May 12th, 2019

    In 1988, divers made a grisly discovery in Crummock Water: they recovered the body of a woman, chained to a car cylinder head. Her name was Sheena, and she has become the forgotten Lady of the Lake. Thirty one years later, I walk from Ennerdale Water over Great Borne, the air filled with the song of the cuckoo and the fragrance of hawthorn blossom. These traditional harbingers of spring are the stuff of folk ritual, but as I reach Red Pike and look down on Crummock Water, I recall Sheena’s story, and I wonder whether ancient beliefs may yet have something to teach us.

    “I have a friend who’s a radio announcer. He stops talking when he walks under bridges”—just one in a rich seam of dry one-liners from the skewed imagination of US comic, Steven Wright. It’s a joke that may be lost on anyone who’s grown up with digital radio, unless, of course, they drive over Corney Fell. Here invisible bridges eat digital radio signal at regular intervals, so I miss most of what Radcliffe and Maconie are saying about the harbingers of spring, but I do catch something about superstition and the May Tree.

    The radio show might have dissolved into stuttered fragments, but the view is unswervingly impressive. We’ve not been starved of sunny days recently, but the light has often been hazy, rendering the landscape as a washed-out impression. Today is different. Everything is in high definition. The pepper pot of Stainton Tower is pin-sharp and the Irish Sea bluer than I’ve ever seen. The Isle of Man rises in the distance like a mythical kingdom from a skirt of sea-mist. The rites of spring are afoot, and the staccato radio reception seems somewhat appropriate, for what are superstitions if not stuttered fragments of once coherent beliefs.

    Ennerdale Water from Herdus
    Ennerdale Water from Herdus

    Before long, I’m edging down the single-track lane to Bowness Knott on the shore of Ennerdale Water with Herdus’s western ridge rising impressively ahead. As I step out of the car, another harbinger of spring reaches my ear: the slow repeating call of the cuckoo. In days gone by, people believed the cuckoo morphed into a hawk during the winter or took refuge in the faery kingdom. When it returned in its familiar form, it brought the spring with it. It’s the first cuckoo call I’ve heard this year. There are many half-forgotten customs you are supposed to enact in response. I seem to remember one about placing a stone on your head, running as far as you can, and launching it into the air. Wherever it lands, a stash of money will await when you return the following day. I think better of it. I’m in a car park after all. Knowing my luck, it’ll fly through someone’s windscreen and end up costing me a great deal more.

    Another old belief says that every repeat of the first cuckoo’s call marks a year of your life. I’m encouraged that it shows no sign of abating as I stroll back along the track toward Rake Beck.

    A pungent natural perfume reaches my nostrils from the white blossom of the hawthorn trees. This is the May Tree of Radcliffe and Maconie’s mention, so called for its May flowering. In Celtic tradition, it is the tree of Beltaine, the ancient festival that celebrates the start of spring and the coming of summer; like Beltaine, the hawthorn symbolises fertility and rebirth.

    The fair maid who, the first of May,
    Goes to the fields at break of day
    And washes in dew from the hawthorn tree,
    Will ever after handsome be”

    Crag Fell from Bowness Knott
    Crag Fell and hawthorn trees

    Hawthorn boughs were cut and woven into May Day crowns or placed in the porches of houses to bring luck, but bringing them inside the house was taboo:

    “Hawthorn bloom and elder-flowers
    Will fill a house with evil powers”

    The tree contains trimethylamine, a chemical found in decaying animal tissue. In medieval times, its blossom was said to smell like the Great Plague, and its presence indoors was associated with death. But this is perhaps a later superstition based on an unsavoury aromatic association. In earlier times, hawthorn was the tree of new life; it was her sister tree, the blackthorn, that was the tree of death.

    In witchcraft, the blackthorn belongs to black magic, while the hawthorn (or white thorn) is the tree of the white witch. Blackthorn is the Celtic tree of Samhain, the festival that marks the coming of winter. Its bitter fruit, the sloe, sweetens after the first frost.

    In Ireland, it was considered unlucky to chop down hawthorn trees as they were said to be home to faery folk. Indeed, thirteenth century Scottish mystic, Thomas Rhymer, met the Faery Queen by a May Tree. She gave him a brief tour of the underworld. It only lasted a matter of hours, but when he returned, he discovered he’d been gone a full seven years. By contrast, the blackthorn is a gateway to communing with the dead. This is not as macabre as it sounds. In ancient belief, communing with the dead helped the living prepare for what must come to us all eventually. 

    Hawthorn near Bowness Knott
    Hawthorn near Bowness Knott

    The same dichotomy applies in traditional healing: blackthorn is an astringent and a purgative; it heals by bringing your pain and darkest thoughts to the surface; it intensifies suffering in order to banish it. Hawthorn is a balm; it soothes pain and eases troubles.

    Blackthorn and whitethorn; winter and summer; death and rebirth; the perpetual cycle of life; and here on the shore of Ennerdale Water, in the warm sunlight, with the tang of new growth, the scent of tree blossom and the call of the cuckoo, all things more likely to trigger a hard-wired religious impulse (in me, at least) than psalms and psalters and thorny theological concepts of original sin.

    Crag Fell over Ennerdale Water
    Crag Fell over Ennerdale Water

    During WWI, large amounts of wood were needed for the war effort. In 1919, the Forestry Commission was established to ensure the UK always had a steady supply of timber. In its early years, the Commission adopted a utilitarian approach, planting vast amounts of fast growing conifer. In Ennerdale, dense sitka spruce plantations blighted the natural landscape, replacing the indigenous flora. Wainwright called this “dark funeral shroud of foreign trees” an act of vandalism. But in 1968, the Commission refocused on conservation, and since 2003, it has been a partner in the Wild Ennerdale project, which is rewilding the valley, thinning the conifer and allowing the old woods to reassert themselves. Perhaps some of the ancient magic is returning.

    I leave the road by a stile, cross Raise Beck and follow a path that climbs the fell side to gain the western ridge of Herdus. Across the valley, Crag Fell sprawls: a gargantuan beast in slumber—its shadowed crags an elephantine hide, its sunlit slopes a pink underbelly, and Anglers Crag its wrinkled snout. The lake is a plate of polished lapis lazuli. As I gain height along the ridge, I look down on Bowness Knott, its rounded top a fishbone pattern of forest green and stone white clearings.

    Looking over Bowness Knott from Herdus

    Traditionally, Herdus is the name for this whole fell, with Great Borne a name for the summit only, but the OS map assigns Herdus its own summit. This is marked on the ground with a cairn and acknowledged as a Birkett. The classification may confuse boundaries, but it does at least do justice to this remarkable viewpoint.

    Great Borne’s summit lies east across a boggy depression. The circuitous path keeps to firmer ground, crossing the head of Rake Beck and joining the path that climbs beside it. As I approach the trig point and shelter that crown the top, the muscular mass of Grasmoor, Whiteside, Wandhope and Whiteless Pike rises in the northwest, dark and shadowy, like an angular edifice of chiselled granite.

    Grasmoor range from Great Borne
    Grasmoor range from Great Borne

    Two fell runners are tracing a route with their fingers. It circuits the whole valley: Starling Dodd, Buttermere Edge, Haystacks, the Gable Girdle, Kirk Fell, Pillar, Scoat Fell, Haycock, Crag Fell.

    “Are you going to run all that?” I ask, incredulous.

    “Not today,” the girl replies, “but it’s what we’re in training for.”

    I follow their dust down to the col and up the gentle grassy slope to Starling Dodd. They’re long gone by the time I reach its twin cairns, one of stones and one a twisted twine of rusted iron fence posts.

    Summit cairns on Starling Dodd
    Summit cairns on Starling Dodd

    Ahead, the slanting pyramid of Red Pike is a sharp end to the High Stile ridge, and to the north,  Crummock Water is glimpsed, an indigo lustre beneath Grasmoor. Grasmoor itself, now free of shadow, is painted chocolate with veins and crests of cinnamon. Southwest, over Ennerdale Water, the Irish Sea is a band of pale blue beyond the green flatlands of the coast.

    Grasmoor and Crummock Water
    Grasmoor and Crummock Water

    Buttermere over Bleaberry Tarn
    Buttermere over Bleaberry Tarn
    Crummock Water
    Crummock Water

    Between here and Red Pike, Little Dodd is a mere hummock, but its modest summit reveals more of the unfolding panorama, Loweswater now peeking coyly between Melbreak and Hen Comb. The peerless grandstand, though, is Red Pike. I eschew the path and scramble an easy gully to get there. As I reach the parapet, there’s a woosh of air and a paraglider takes flight. I watch it soar westward then arc round over Crummock Water. What a perfect day to have a hawk’s eye view. I look over at the small band of walkers assembled on the summit—everyone is rapt, everyone is smiling, all is well with the world.

    Paraglider takes off, Red Pike
    Paraglider takes off, Red Pike
    Paraglider
    Paraglider
    Paraglider and Ennerdale Water
    Paraglider and Ennerdale Water
    Paraglider heading for Crummock Water
    Paraglider heading for Crummock Water

    ~

    But all was far from well in the world of Kevin Owlett when he stepped from his car by Crummock’s shore and dragged his wife’s body from the boot. He’d wrapped her in chains to which he’d tied a car cylinder head and an open plastic barrel. He waded out into Crummock Water, pulling her corpse behind him. When she began to float, he swam out further and submerged the barrel so it filled with water and dragged her under. He nearly joined her. His foot had become snagged in the electrical wire he’d used to secure the barrel. But he managed to struggle free. So it was just his wife’s body that members of a sub aqua club discovered in 1988.

    Her name was Sheena. She is the forgotten Lady of the Lake. The names of Margaret Hogg (found in Wastwater in 1984) and Carol Ann Park (found in Coniston in 1997) are better known. In 1988/1989, the Piper Alpha oil rig disaster and the Hillsborough stadium tragedy conspired to keep Sheena’s story from the front pages.

    The Wastwater case had been an uncanny precedent. When he was tried for murder, three years earlier, Peter Hogg claimed his wife had been having an affair which she made no effort to disguise. On the fateful night, she tired of merely taunting him and physically attacked him. In a fit of rage he grabbed her by the throat and squeezed too long. He hadn’t meant to kill her.

    Kevin’s defence was remarkably similar: Sheena had mocked his sexual prowess, boasted of having an affair and accused him of sleeping with a work colleague. When the shouting stopped, she’d attacked him with a wine bottle.

    I’m not convinced a modern jury would have shown leniency in either case, but in 1985, jurors at the Old Bailey found in Peter’s favour and acquitted him of murder. He served three years for manslaughter and an additional year for perjury.

    It didn’t work for Kevin. Even in the 1980’s, the apparent degree of planning that had gone into Sheena’s disposal made it impossible to believe her death had not been premeditated.

    What degree of pain and desperation drives someone to go that far? How screwed up do you have to be to kill someone you presumably loved once. It’s tragic when a relationship breaks down, but there should be life beyond a broken marriage for both parties. Sitting here now, I can’t help but wonder what would have happened if Kevin had simply come here first. Just wandered, breathed this in, taken time out to think.

    Crummock Water
    Crummock Water

    Doctors are increasingly waking up to the mental health benefits of the great outdoors; some prescribe country walks ahead of anti-depressants. Modern living divorces us from natural rhythms. Cities never sleep; they are places of perpetual light, heat and noise, where everything is always available, no matter what the season. It’s artificial and it disconnects us from who we really are. It makes us forget something that we have always known; something deep in our DNA: that we are children of nature, and nature works in cycles. Pain is an inescapable part of living, but however intense, and however great the effort to overcome it, it passes. And when it does, it gives way to joy, just as night gives way to day, and winter gives way to spring. Death and rebirth. Samhain and Beltaine. Blackthorn and hawthorn.

    When I arrive back at the shore of Ennerdale Water, the cuckoo is still calling. I’ve a good few cycles left, it seems.

    Ennerdale Water
    Ennerdale Water

    For more on Wastwater and Margaret Hogg, see my blog, A Walk on the Wild Side

    Further Reading:

    The hawthorn & the blackthorn

    Trees for Life: Mythology and folklore of the hawthorn

    Druidry~Tree Lore: The Blackthorn

    Druidry~Tree Lore: The Hawthorn

    Cuckoos

    Legendary Dartmoor: Cuckoos

    BBC Guersey: A few cuckoo superstitions

    Sheena Owlett/Lady of the Lake murder

    Ladies of The Lakes, case three: Sheena Owlett


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      Rhiannon

      A Midsummer Night’s Dream on Dixon Heights

      One of the positives of lockdown has been waking up to what is right on your doorstep. With its ruined tower, Bay views, and fell ponies, Dixon Heights (Newton Fell South) is a Wainwright outlier, rich in enchantment. Its mention in the Annals of Cartmel reads like a nineteenth century episode of Father Ted. As I discover, on the eve of midsummer, it can prove veritably dreamlike.

      “Things seen, things remembered, and things imagined are blended together into a delicate landscape which is half reality and half dream, but in which the dream helps to clarify rather than to obscure that which is really there.”

      Norman Nicholson

      In its heady days as a watering hole for coach and horses, High Newton boasted three inns. Now there’s only The Crown, a fine pub, but closed this evening, due to lockdown. Newton was once a stop on the horse-drawn omnibus route from Lancaster to Ulverston. As 19th century interest in the Lakes awakened, a steady stream of curious sightseers made the journey, inspired in part by the hyperbole of early apostles of the picturesque, like William Gilpin. In 1820, a new turnpike opened through Levens, Lindale, and Newton that offered an alternative to the perilous race over Morecambe Bay. In his guidebook of 1842, J Hudson commends the route to “those Tourists who dislike to cross the sands”, adding, “the road is excellent, and passes through a pleasant and agreeable country”.

      For the best part of two centuries, High and Low Newton suffered their share of pass-through traffic. Fifteen years ago, you needed your wits about you to cross this road. It was a single carriageway bottleneck on the A590, and an accident black spot. In 2006, however, work began on a bypass that would transform village life here. The new stretch of dual carriageway opened in 2008 and reduced traffic through the villages from 17,900 vehicles per day to 550. This midsummer evening, with the road journeys restricted further by COVID, I see none. The prevailing sounds are the distant bleat of lambs and a sudden downbeat of big wings as a buzzard takes off from an overhanging branch.

      Buzzard
      Buzzard

      Our house looks out on Newton Fell, the long low heather-clad ridge that runs north through the woods of Chapel House and Simpson Ground to the rocky summit of Gummer’s How, perched above Windermere. Wainwright features Newton Fell in his book of outliers, dividing it into two separate walks which he calls Newton Fell North and Newton Fell South. No right of way exists between them, and although much of the ground is now open access, there is still a portion that is not, an untempered legacy of an 1806 land-grab—the enclosure of the Cartmel Commons.

      With lockdown keeping me from the mountains, I’ve been taking a deeper interest in what is right on my doorstep. The trek along the ridge from the Newton reservoirs over the tops of Saskills (Newton Fell’s summit) and the weathered crag of White Stone has become a fast favourite, but until last week, I’d never climbed the southern tip, Dixon Heights. It is the shortest of fell walks but rich in enchantment, and on this balmy midsummer’s eve, I’m eager for some solstice magic.

      Dixon Heights from Bishops Tithe Allotment
      Dixon Heights from Bishops Tithe Allotment

      Wainwright climbed Dixon Heights from Lindale, but his route is bisected now by the dual carriageway. Happily, there is an alternative that starts closer to home for me. Opposite Yew Tree Barn Antiques in Low Newton, a track skirts a farm and narrows to a public footpath, little more than a furrow through the bracken.  As I leave the road, I disturb a grazing roe deer. It darts away through dense foliage, a ripple in the fern. Beyond a gate, the path forks. The lower prong hugs the wall, but the higher one climbs through a sea of leafy green, dotted purple with the cascading bells of foxgloves. Red admirals flit over canary coloured tormentil, and as the trod meanders toward the ridge line, craggy outcrops spring from the undergrowth like eroded ruins of ancient temples. To the right of Buck Crag, over the lush flatland of Cartmel valley, I catch my first glimpse of the Bay.

      Path to DIxon Heights, Low Newton
      Path to DIxon Heights, Low Newton
      Ridge line Bishops Tithe Allotment
      Ridge line Bishops Tithe Allotment
      Bracken, foxgloves, and rocky outcrop, Dixon Heights
      Bracken, foxgloves, and rocky outcrop, Dixon Heights

      The first summit is Bishop’s Tithe Allotment, a name echoed in a portion of neighbouring Hampsfell, which suggests the church may have been an early beneficiary of the enclosures. The elevation is a humble 620 feet, but it boasts fine views. The Bay stretches out to the south, and Arnside Knott rises across the Kent Estuary. The eastern skyline is dominated by the dark distant shapes of the Pennines, the Howgills and Ingleborough. Closer at hand, across the Winster valley, is another Wainwright outlier, one of his favourites, Whitbarrow Scar. Its western flank is long and wooded, but it presents a 200 foot escarpment to the A590, and to the turnpike that preceded it. To J Hudson, writing with all the poetic overstatement of his age, it was, “a huge arched and bended cliff, of an immense height”.

      Bishop's Tithe Allotment
      Bishop’s Tithe Allotment

      Down in the valley, the River Winster forms a natural parish boundary. A country lane runs from High Newton to Witherslack, borne over its waters by the twin arches of an old stone bridge. According to James Stockdale’s Annals of Cartmel (1872), here in April 1576, stood the gibbet from which Richard Taylor swung, deliberately conspicuous from the road, a macabre moral lesson to all would-be ne’er do wells. Stockdale writes,

      “The highway road from Newton-in-Cartmel to Witherslack, after the steep zigzag descent of Towtop, crosses the river Winster at Bleacragg Bridge (so spelled in the Ordnance map, 1850). On the Lancashire side of the river, and adjoining the south-western end of the bridge, is a small rocky knoll, on which some Scotch fir and larch trees now grow; this knoll has always had the name of “Gallows Hill,” which may be accounted for by the above register, though all other tradition of the crime and its punishment has been lost.” 

      The church register, from which Stockdale quotes, states, “April 10. Richard Taylor was buryed whoe suffered the same daye at Blakragge bridge end for murthering wilfullye Richard Kilner of Witherslack.”

      If Bleacrag bridge supplies Stockdale with a dark tale, Buck Crag, on the western slope of Bishop’s Tithe Allotment, furnishes a lighter one. At the start of the 18th century, the farmhouse at its foot was home to Edmund Law, the curate and schoolmaster at Staveley. Stockdale praises Law for his “pedestrian achievements” and calculates that by walking the eight miles there and back to the church and school every day, over his forty-nine years in post, Law must have clocked up 122,696 miles—“a distance more than equal to five times the circumference of our globe”. Edmund remained a humble footsore curate, but his educational prowess propelled his progeny into high office: his son became the Lord Bishop of Carlisle, and his grandsons went on to become variously, the Bishop of Elphin, Baron Ellenborough, and the Bishop of Bath and Wells.

      Stockdale describes the house at Buck Crag as “one of the most homely and lonely places in these realms”, but evidently, it held such a fascination for Law’s grandsons that, in 1818, one of the bishops arrived on the doorstep, replete with an entourage of clerics and a secretary, and much to the astonishment of the farmer who now lived there, requested a thorough tour of the premises. Apparently, “t’Bishop inquir’t t’dog tail aut a-joint”. Meanwhile, a scene straight from Father Ted was playing out on the fell: “Whilst all this was going on, some of the younger clergymen took the opportunity, under the guidance of the farmer’s two daughters, to scale and scramble over the precipices of Buck Crag and the mountains adjoining; but whether it was the delightful scenery or the presence of the ladies that rendered them oblivious, they certainly quite forgot ‘that time hath wings,’ and having kept the bishop a long time waiting, they did not escape some mild reproof for tarrying so unnecessarily long on the top of Buck Crag”.  The Bishop himself, it seems, left with his grandfather’s old armchair from “i’ t’ingle neak” as a keepsake, despite some mild reluctance from the farmer who had grown rather fond of it.

      Top of Bishop's Tithe Allotment
      Bishop’s Tithe Allotment above Buck Crag

      From the summit, the ridge continues south, dropping 130 ft to the saddle with Dixon Heights. At the bottom of the depression, Tom Tarn nestles beside a copse. In wetter times, a stone wall divides its waters, but after weeks of little rain, it’s dry, distinguished only by a small expanse of cracked mud. Whitbarrow Scar to the east and Hampsfell to the west are renowned for their limestone pavements, but Newton Fell is an outcrop of older Silurian mudstone, muddy siltstone, and muddy sandstone of the Bannisdale formation. In times past, the slopes down to the tarn were quarried for slate and flag. I lose the path amid prolific undergrowth. To regain it, I affect an easy scramble over a grey face of cut slate, now prettily laced with white and pink petals of English stonecrop. I disturb a skylark. It shoots skyward, its flight a succession of deft tacks on the arc of white-tipped wings.

      Rocky Outcrop Dixon Heights
      Rocky Outcrop Dixon Heights

      A gate by the tarn leads through to Dixon Heights. The wall disappears into the deep tree cover, but ahead, there is a grassy clearing, mown close by the carefree grazing of the wild ponies that dwell here. Beyond, a hawthorn covered bank rises to the grassy top. Here stands a ruined tower.

      The Tower Dixon Heights
      The Tower Dixon Heights

      In 1827, architect George Webster, acquired Dixon Heights and built an elegant country mansion, Eller How, at its foot. Webster made his name extending and remodelling stately homes like Hutton in the Forest, Dallam Tower and Holker Hall. He also built Kendal Town Hall and several local churches. Eller How became his home. It is often supposed that Webster erected the summit tower as a romantic folly, but in his book of 1849, succinctly named, A History, Topography, and Directory, of Westmorland: And Londsdale North of the Sands, in Lancashire Together with a Descriptive and Geological View of the Whole of the Lake District, P. J. Mannix calls it an observatory. Wainwright says it was used by the Home Guard during the war but suggests its origins are obscure.  According to Wainwright, a local legend claims it was “a lookout for the observation of smugglers in the estuary”, but he admits it’s equally likely that it was “merely a decoration of the Eller How estate”.

      The Tower, Dixon Heights
      The Tower, Dixon Heights

      Whatever its original purpose, it is a romantic ruin now and a fine viewpoint over the estuary and the Bay. As I settle on its old stones and surrender to the charm of midsummer solitude, the soft light of evening weaves a gentle magic.

      The Tower, Dixon Heights
      The Tower, Dixon Heights
      The Tower, Dixon Heights
      The Tower, Dixon Heights

      I’m not quite alone. A feral white horse is grazing at the edge of the summit plateau, its taught muscular frame, flowing tail and unkempt mane, the epitome of wild majesty. Backdropped by the shimmering mudflats of the estuary, shores braided with dark woodland, and lit by an opal sky feathered silver with cirrocumulus, the whole scene is beguilingly beautiful. The horse looks ethereal, not quite of this world: a vision of something simpler, something older, something finer. I’m entranced, and I watch for a long while, lost in the rarefied poetry of the moment. It’s a wrench to tear myself away.

      White horse, Dixon Heights
      Rhiannon
      White Mare and the Bay from the Tower
      Dixon Heights (Newton Fell South)
      Dixon Heights (Newton Fell South)

      Below the summit, on a wooded bank above the track that leads to Eller How, there is a weathered arch. This was certainly a folly, likely built by Webster as a mock ruin; the vogue for the picturesque prized ruins in the landscape, and it became fashionable to build your own. William Gilpin, a devout apostle of the movement, frowned on such contrivance, but after two and half centuries, nature has conspired to turn this arch into the very thing it was meant to mimic, a gothic relic. Wainwright sketched it with more battlements than it boasts now, so perhaps Gilpin would relent, and admire the effect of time and weather on these chiselled stones. After the dreamlike wonder of the white horse, the arch assumes an air of Arthurian romance.

      Arch, Dixon Heights
      Arch, Dixon Heights

      One version of the Arthurian legend can be found in the Mabinogion, a collection of Welsh stories composed in the 13th century from older Celtic tales. When waves of pagan invaders pushed into Cumbria, its Celtic priests and poets fled to Wales, taking their traditions with them, so it is entirely possible that some of the stories of the Mabinogion are Cumbrian in origin.

      The Arch, DIxon Heights
      The Arch, DIxon Heights

      Also featured in the Mabinogion, is Rhiannon, a woman of the Otherworld, who appears to Pwyll, Prince of Dyfed, astride a horse. Smitten with her beauty, Pwyll follows her, but despite her gentle pace, he can never catch her until he implores her to stop, which she does willingly and rebukes him for not asking earlier. Rhiannon then reveals she has chosen Pwyll to be her husband. Pwyll and Rhiannon marry, but their son is abducted on the night of his birth. Fearing execution for their negligence, his nursemaids kill a puppy and smear the sleeping Rhiannon with its blood. Just as they plan, she is accused of murder and cannibalism. Pwyll refuses to abandon her and retains her as queen, but she is obliged to undergo a penance. Every day, she must sit outside the castle by the stable block and profess her crime to visitors. She must then offer to carry them into the castle on her back, like a beast of burden. Eventually, a vision of a foal being stolen from a mare by a dark presence leads to the baby’s rescue and to Rhiannon’s exoneration.

      Rhiannon is associated with the Gaulish horse goddess, Epona, and often portrayed as a maiden. But in some depictions, Rhiannon, herself, is an ethereal white mare.

      “Things seen, things remembered, and things imagined are blended together into a delicate landscape which is half reality and half dream, but in which the dream helps to clarify rather than to obscure that which is really there.”

      White horse, Dixon Heights

      Further Reading/Sources

      Stockdale, James. 1872: Annals of Cartmel. Ulverston: William Kitchen; London: Simpkin, Marshall, & Co

      Guest, Lady Charlotte E. (Translator). 1838: The Mabinogion. Dover Publications, 2000

      Wainwright, A. 1974: The Outlying Fells of Lakeland. Kendal: The Westmorland Gazette

      Nicholson, Norman. 1955: The Lakers. Milnthorpe: Cicerone Press, 1995.

      Hudson, J. 1842: A Complete Guide To Wordsworth’s Scenery of the Lakes of England.

      Mannex, P. J. 1849: History, Topography, and Directory, of Westmorland.
      London: Simpkin, Marshall & Co.

      Thomas, P.R.. 2006 Geology of the area between Lindale and Witherslack. Nottingham, UK, British Geological Survey, 39pp. (IR/06/079) (Unpublished), Available at: http://nora.nerc.ac.uk/id/eprint/7302/


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        A Walk on the Wild Side

        The Mosedale Horseshoe and a Night at Black Sail

        A tough but beautiful walk around the Mosedale Horseshoe takes in some of England’s finest mountain scenery and ends with a night at the country’s remotest youth hostel, deep in the wilds of Ennerdale. It begins by the shore of Wastwater, where the sight of divers kitting up in the car park, stirs memories of a notorious 80’s murder enquiry.

        The Lady in the Lake

        There’s something utterly wild about Wastwater. Forget the pastoral prettiness of Windermere or Coniston, England’s deepest lake is a feral beast; savagely beautiful but ever poised to bare its teeth. On this July morning, the sky is overcast and there’s a distinct chill in the breeze. The choppy waters are gun-barrel grey, rippled with white-crested waves; dark and inscrutable, daring you to guess at the secrets beneath.

        Wastwater from Yewbarrow
        Wastwater from Yewbarrow

        In the wooded parking area beside Overbeck Bridge, two men are preparing to find out. As they don dry suits and all manner of sophisticated diving gear, Tim remarks they must reckon it’ll be seriously cold. One of the divers looks up and smiles, “yeah, at 40 metres down, the temperature stays pretty much the same all year round”.

        40 metres is the limit for diving with compressed air. Below that, special suits and gas mixtures are needed to survive. For all the lake’s imagined mystery, what most divers find is an endless expanse of mud; or perhaps, if they’re lucky, the gnome garden, introduced by an enterprising soul to add a bit of novelty to the view.

        On occasion, though, Wastwater has yielded darker secrets. In 1984, Neil Pritt was diving at a depth of 34 metres when he spied a rolled-up carpet tied to a concrete block. At first, he dismissed it as the efforts of an ambitious fly-tipper, but aware that police had recently searched the lake, looking for missing French fell-walker, Veronique Mireille Marre, Neil took a closer look. His suspicions were confirmed – the carpet concealed the body of a woman.
        But it wasn’t Veronique. Whoever she was, she’d been down there some time. The cold had preserved her so well, it was only a matter of days before police made a positive ID. In the meantime, the press dubbed her “The Lady of the Lake”.

        When investigators removed her wedding ring, it bore the inscription, “Margaret 15-11-63 Peter”. Detectives made the connection with the case of Margaret Hogg from Guildford, reported missing by her husband, Peter in 1976. Peter was arrested. Under interrogation, he capitulated and confessed to killing his wife but claimed extreme provocation. He told the Old Bailey how Margaret had been having an affair, which she made little effort to conceal. According to his testimony, on the night in question, Margaret tired of merely taunting her husband and physically attacked him. Peter retaliated by grabbing her by the throat and squeezing hard. When the life went out of her eyes, he stopped. When she slumped to the floor, he realised she was dead and coolly hatched a plan that very nearly proved the perfect crime.

        After wrapping Margaret’s body in an old carpet, Peter put her in the boot of the car with a rubber dingy, a roll of carpet, and a concrete block. Then he drove through the night to Wastwater. Had Peter rowed out a few metres further, Margaret’s body would have fallen into the “abyss” and sunk all the way to the bottom, at nearly twice the depth a diver could reach. As it was, she came to rest on a shelf just under half way down, where she would remain for the next eight years.

        I’m not sure what a modern jury would have made of Peter’s defence, but in 1984, a woman’s infidelity was enough to hand the moral high ground to the man. Peter was acquitted of murder and given three years for manslaughter, plus an extra year for obstructing the coroner and committing perjury in divorce proceedings.

        Veronique’s body was later found at the bottom of Broken Rib Crag. The coroner returned an open verdict, but there was nothing to suggest that this was anything other than a tragic accident.

        The Mosedale Horseshoe

        For all its brooding solitude, Wastwater is magnificently beautiful. The vista over lake, to the fells at its head, has been voted Britain’s favourite view. Great Gable takes centre stage, while in the foreground, resembling the hull of an upturned boat, stands Yewbarrow. Yewbarrow is the start of the Mosedale Horseshoe, an airy circuit that boasts some of the finest mountain scenery in Lakeland. Tim and I are going to walk the ridge to its highest point on Pillar. From there, we’ll descend into the wilds of neighbouring Ennerdale for a night at England’s remotest youth hostel – the Black Sail hut.

        We leave the car park following the stream, cross a stile, and turn right on to a steep and unrelenting grass slope. Ahead is the formidable face of Bell Rib. There doesn’t appear to be a way up for mere mortals. Indeed, Wainwright declares it “unclimbable except by experts”, adding, “maps showing paths going straight over it are telling fibs”. Fortunately, the Ordnance Survey is less aspirational. Their route skirts left and climbs between Bell Rib and Dropping Crag. Such is the gradient, we’re looking for the fork long before we reach it.

        The path ends abruptly at a steep, stone-filled gully. We put hand to rock and start to climb. At just over 2000 ft., Yewbarrow is the baby of the group, but it’s no mean mountain and won’t surrender its summit without a struggle.

        Wastwater over Bell Rib
        Wastwater over Bell Rib

        At the top, a grass slope leads to a narrow ridge beyond Bell Rib. Behind us, Wastwater is a shimmer of silver beneath the whitening cloud. When we reach the crest, a dramatic cleft in the crags, known as The Great Door, frames a canvas of rich but sombre tones: the shadowed lake a dark sash of royal satin, deep and vivid blue; hemmed by the solemn Screes, their slopes mottled with daubs of gold and green, and deftly flecked with feathered brushstrokes, like copper flames that flicker up to kiss a scarf of purple heather.

        Poised above the water’s edge, a dark vestigial verge of coppice, a lone patch of fur on an else clean-shaven pelt.

        Cupped high among bottle-green spires, Burnmoor Tarn is a glint, a duck-egg glimmer, a hint of hidden brightness, cajoling the bashful sun to break cover.

        Tim at the Great Door
        Tim at the Great Door

        Wastwater and Burnmoor Tarn
        Wastwater and Burnmoor Tarn

        A few easy rock steps remain between here and the summit. When we arrive, the panorama is remarkable; Pillar rises like barnacled leviathan from the mossy sea of Mosedale; sunlight gilds the green skirts of Kirk Fell and, to the east, the Roof of England is cloaked in cloud, Mickledore just visible through the mist like a gateway to Middle Earth.

        Pillar rising above Mosedale
        Pillar rising above Mosedale

        Across a depression, we stride up Stirrup Crag and glimpse our onward path. Thin wisps of cloud float like wood smoke around the top of Red Pike. A faint path snakes through charcoal crags to a carpet of olive green above.

        The way lies across Dore Head, some 300 feet below. If we’d studied the contours we’d have known the path that swung left, a little way back, was the easier proposition. As it is, we stick with the one we’re on and climb down the crag itself; descending abruptly through a maze of chimneys; easing down bulwarks on jagged ledges; stepping back from dead-ends that stop in sudden drops. It’s slow and a touch unnerving, but there’s only one sticky moment: a parapet I think I can shimmy down in two small stretches. But I misjudge. Now, over-committed, I’m obliged to jump – a little too far for comfort. Thankfully, I land well, with all extremities intact, and manage not to career over the next edge.

        Once down, we’re slightly shocked at how severe Stirrup Crag looks from below and wonder if we’d have attempted it had we known. I later read that Wainwright left a trail of blood over these rocks and feel relieved they weren’t craving a fresh sacrifice. For some reason, Tim chooses now to mention that the Black Sail Youth Hostel cancellation policy includes a plea to the effect – “let us know if you are not coming. If we’re expecting you and you don’t show, we’ll send out Mountain Rescue.” I’m not sure whether it’s a comfort or a concern.

        A party of around 15 fresh faced teenagers has arrived at Dore Head ahead of us. They took the sensible path. In fact, they may have bypassed Yewbarrow altogether. They’re now comfortably ensconced in a rest and refreshment break that looks set to extend indefinitely. If they’re going to tackle the full round at this rate, it could prove a very long day. I hope they’re not descending from here, though. The traditional way down to Mosedale is a notorious scree slope. Once the delight of scree runners, it’s now so dangerously eroded it looks concave from below. A grass rake offers an alternative but even that looks severe. I think of Veronique Marre and conclude some risks just aren’t worth taking; then try not to think about that as I look back over Stirrup Crag on the way up Red Pike.

        Kirk fell from Red Pike
        Kirk fell from Red Pike

        Once on top, isolated shafts of sunlight steal through cracks in the cloud. Scoat Tarn sparkles to the south, the adamantine lustre of lost treasure, scattered in the bracken. Haycock is now in sight, while, northward, Great Gable rises over Kirk Fell, a pyramid no more, but a mighty dome, surged from the earth in an ancient eruption of volcanic violence. Beyond the summit, we perch on crags above Black Combe and eat pies, looking across to Pillar and the stiff stream of scree tapering to the col of Wind Gap.

        Out of the breeze, it’s warm. Certainly, warm enough for midges to swarm around Tim. Apparently, he only had space in his rucksack for one bottle, so it was a toss-up between sun cream and midge repellent. He went with sun cream, which is probably why the sun has, so far, been so coy. Tim swears by a midge repellent that’s marketed by Avon as a moisturiser. It’s called Skin So Soft and whenever he produces a bottle, he feels compelled to assure me “it’s what the SAS use”. He retreats into the breeze and the midges turn on me, so I’m compelled to join him.

        We climb the saddle to Scoat Fell and catch our first sight of Ennerdale Water, a pale sheen against the dense green of the pine plantations on its banks. The summit lies a little to our left and a fine ridge runs out to Steeple, which looks as inspiring as its name. It’s all too tempting for anyone with fire in their blood. But we’ll have fire in our bellies too and we still have some way to go before we reach Black Sail. Supper is served at seven, so to arrive ravenous and find we’d missed it would be miserable. There’s also that thing in the cancellation clause that convinces us to press on to Black Crags without detour. From there, we descend to Wind Gap and begin the tough pull up to Pillar. With the exertion, any residual disappointment at skipping Steeple turns to quiet relief.

        Ennerdale Water
        Ennerdale Water

        Steeple
        Steeple

        Few labours reward so richly, however. As we reach the summit, the sun breaks through, illuminating the landscape in way that is nothing short of magical. Pillar Rock rises majestically above a sward of conifer; Great Gable is a tower of rugged glory; Broad Stand, finally free of cloud, a brutal bastion on the ramparts of Sca Fell. But as shafts of sunlight dance across the slopes, this terrain of intransigent rock manages to evoke nothing so much as a swirling Turner seascape: the white splashes of exposed rock are surf and spray; dark crags, the welling eddies; the wave upon wave of rolling peaks, a surging ocean, every shade of green.

        Pillar Rock
        Pillar Rock

        Great Gable from Pillar
        Great Gable from Pillar

        Broad Stand, Sca Fell
        Broad Stand, Sca Fell

        High Crag, Robinson and Hindscarth from Pillar
        High Crag, Robinson and Hindscarth from Pillar

        Ennerdale from Pillar
        Ennerdale from Pillar

        Robinson and Hindscarth
        Robinson and Hindscarth

        All the way down to Looking Stead, I linger, attempting to capture this on camera. It’s beyond my skills and if I lavish words, it’s only to try and convey what pictures fail to tell.

        Descending to Black Sails Pass
        Descending to Black Sails Pass

        At the top of Black Sail Pass, we meet a man who asks us if we’ve seen a party of 15 teenagers. They’re not late, he’s just bored of waiting. Something tells me he’s in for a long day.

        Black Sail Hut

        We descend into Ennerdale, where, in the remotest corner of this wildest of valleys, lies an old shepherd’s bothy: The Black Sail Hut, now a Youth Hostel and our home for the night. A warm welcome and cold beers await. We sit outside on wooden benches in the golden light of evening and watch the Galloway cattle, that roam free like big black bison, old as the hills.

        Ennerdale
        Ennerdale

        Tim disappears for a shower and I watch a small figure wend her way down the long path from Windy Gap, between Great and Green Gable. When she arrives, she unshoulders her pack, grabs a beer and joins me outside. We compare notes on our routes. As we chat, I suddenly realise why she looks familiar. It’s Yvonne, a friend of my wife’s from about ten years ago. Yvonne is a high-powered consultant to head gardeners. I’ve only met her once, when she led a tour of the grounds in a Lakeland stately home, dispensing invaluable tricks and tips, some of which I wrote down and perpetually promise to put into practice. She asks about Sandy and we laugh out loud at the odds of meeting like this. Tim reappears around the corner, and the midges make a bee-line for him. Yvonne proffers a bottle of repellent. “Skin So Soft” he beams delightedly, then drops his voice an octave and adds “the SAS use it, you know”.

        Great Gable from Black Sails Hut
        Great Gable from Black Sail Hut

        Relaxing at Black Sails Hut
        Relaxing at Black Sail Hut

        After supper, we sip beers and swap stories with two guys sharing our dorm. They’re old friends from London, who have moved out of the capital in different directions but meet up once or twice a year for walking holidays. They’ve been in the Lakes all week, tramping the hills and staying in hostels. There are three of them but the third has turned in for an early night. Unsurprisingly, he’s the first up in the morning. I join him for a coffee while we wait for breakfast. He tells me how they got a light soaking on top of Haystacks late yesterday afternoon.

        “That’s odd” I say, “we were on Pillar around that time, looking down on Haystacks. It looked as if it was in sunshine.”

        He looks puzzled, then shrugs, “perhaps it was earlier – three-ish possibly”. Very localised showers are possible in the hills, but it still doesn’t quite add up.

        “We stayed at Honister Youth Hostel, last night”, he continues.

        “No, you didn’t”, I shout (silently), “you stayed here. I’ve just seen you get out of bed”.

        “We’ve been lucky today though”, he goes on, “it’s been dry all day”.

        Incredulous, I want to scream, “It’s quarter to eight in the morning. You’ve not been anywhere yet and besides, it’s bucketing it down”… but then I realise, he’s just a day out. By “today”, he means “yesterday”, “yesterday” means the day before. Suddenly, everything makes sense. It’s pretty much the same account we got from his mates – you just have to subtract a day.

        It’s an odd idiosyncrasy, but I can think of two possible explanations: he’s either a timelord or, after several consecutive days on the fells, the days begin to blur. I’ve been out for one night and I can already understand that.

        Everything that seems so integral to our existence – the bustle of the working week, its routines, schedules, deadlines – simply dwindles in importance out here; it’s all fluster, all folly, all “sound and fury, signifying nothing”. Our own inflated sense of self-importance, seems equally ridiculous. Set against the timeless scale of this primal landscape, our hive and industry seem no more significant than the swarming of midges.

        Sunset over Ennerdale
        Sunset over Ennerdale

        I scratch the bites and the simile suddenly seems poignant – we too do disproportionate damage. Wainwright called Ennerdale’s pine plantations an act of vandalism – a defacing of the indigenous landscape – but we do much worse than this. And with a climate change denier in the White House, efforts to curb our excesses are under threat.

        In the 60’s, a NASA scientist called James Lovelock wrote a book called GAIA, in which he argues the Earth acts like a single living organism. Its ecosystems adapt and evolve to marginalise or eliminate threats. If he’s right, even now, the planet could be developing a natural strain of Skin So Soft to send us blighters packing.

        My mind wanders back to the here and now where my new acquaintance is finishing his account. I conclude he’s a timelord and we refer to him thereafter as the Doctor.

        With the cloud down and heavy rain set in, we abandon plans to climb Great Gable and head back over the Black Sail Pass. It’s an opportunity postponed, not lost, as one thing is certain. We’re coming back here.

        Black Sails Hut
        Black Sails Hut


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